Thursday, March 25, 2010

The Illogica Conservaretardica and other Important Musings




Wow. I know - WOW, what a week in the world of polarization USA-style and a wee bit in Canada too. Lots of weirdness, mirth and shit to be concerned about so without the proverbial further blah blah blah let me start off with one of my fave conservaretards, Glenn (dreck) Beck and in all fairness the divulgence of a deep, dark secret.

Beck is expert at contradicting himself - sometimes four or five times in the same rant. I lost count at five the one day because he was yelling so loudly I thought I was back in Highschool so I did what any smart kid would have done, I tuned him out. Damn, I really have to work on getting back up to par on that particular skill.

Beck gets my first nomination for CONSERVARETARD (or just ConservaTard) of the New Millenium. His vitriol, his passions, his convictions - as crazy as he can be I do find him alluring in a very twisted way.

His lips, the source of all that passion, how they curl up in righteous indignation - the mere sight of his lips gets my dirty mind into overtime and I envision doing things with that mouth of his, if anything to shut him up for awhile but at the same time give old Glen a taste of something far more palatable than a fractured, twisted ideology. Yes, I have this thing for men with inviting lips. Soft, not too big nor too small a mouth, strong, seeking - god, I am getting hot just writing this! I am thoroughly enjoying this woman in her forties business immensely. (sherpa boy be forwarned - the weekend could be fraught with spring cleaning activities?)

Most of these Conservatards, of the male variety anyway, I would never be remotely attracted to - mind you a couple of the chicks are hot but when they start talking all I hear is BITCH, BITCH, SOCIALISTS, COMMIES, KILL, WHINY LIBERALS.....yadda yadda yadda! Most of the male media Conservatards just don't do it for me. There, I admit it. Women are just as bad as men when it comes to looks vs. substance.

Rush always looks like he is gonna explode like Mr. Creosote in The Meaning of Life (one wafer thin mint?) O'Reilly is a creepy bastard, Hannity looks as if he has a vibrating buttplug operating at all times (is this why he is so full of shit?) and Lou Dobbs sounds as if he would talk to you in the throes of passion the same way he talks on his show.....arrggh! But Beck, beautiful Glen Beck and those lips....man, I could get lost in that fullness of promise.

There! Proof positive that old DG is truly a sick and twisted masochist if you did not already believe that theory. All my friends are now cringing and wondering if I am on some sort of experimental drug therapy.

2 comments:

Heidi Walker said...

A smirk on the right mouth gets me every time.

DriveGoddess said...

I still ain't done with this one.....muahahahaha